Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Wicked Wednesday: Self Esteem Issues

As I am working diligently on my next novella I find myself completely immersed in my heroine. Casey is different than anyone else I've ever written. She's beautiful but unaware of it, smart but doesn't feel like it and completely down on herself.

In short, she's awesome but doesn't KNOW she is.

Most of my heroines have been pretty kick ass. Confident, self-assured and ready to rock whatever comes their way. I usually feel that way myself so it makes total sense that this comes out in my writing. So why the sudden urge to write about a woman who has no idea who she is or where she's going?

I think every one of us, no matter how confident we may be, has moments of self doubt. Moments where you wonder if you're making the right decisions in life or whether you can really manage all the things you've taken on. We all doubt our awesomeness at some point. And I think it's important to acknowledge that we all feel this way sometimes and that it's completely O-K.

So - here's to all my sisters who may not know yet just how great they are. This one's for you.


Excerpt from ASK FOR IT

* * * * *
Casey stared at herself in the mirror and tried to find words. All she could come up with was “Wow.”

She stood in the middle of a dressing room at Neiman Marcus, clothes strewn around the large space helter-skelter as if they’d been caught in a hurricane. She supposed in a way they had. Hurricane Anya. The woman was easily a category five when it came to her powers of persuasion.

“You look amazing.” Anya clapped her hands and started taking bows. She blew imaginary kisses to herself in the full length mirror. “Yes, I know I’m brilliant. She’s my greatest creation.”

“I can’t believe that’s me.” Casey blinked rapidly against a sudden rush of grateful tears. She wore a long sweep of material, a soft pool of silk that swirled around her body like a cloud. It slid against her skin in a seductive caress, tickling her like a lover. She pivoted and looked at the plunging back drape. It dipped low enough to entice but still covered enough that she didn’t feel self conscious. It was more beautiful than anything she could have imagined or wished for.

“I don’t look so pale anymore.” The deep amethyst color made her skin glow like alabaster. She gave a little twirl and watched the skirt flare out showing a hint of leg. This was a dress for someone glamorous, someone daring. She’d never worn anything like it before.

“You look radiant. Like a moon goddess.” Anya moved around her, her blue eyes taking everything in. “But you’re still missing something. I’m not sure what.”

Casey bit her lip and looked at her reflection again. Who was she trying to fool? She didn’t have the guts to wear something this slinky and wouldn’t know what to do even if she did. She wasn’t good at being the center of attention. She never knew what to say or do or how to act.

Curling up in her favorite armchair with a cup of hot tea and a book was more her style. She might occasionally dream about being the belle of the ball but that was fantasy. She knew better than most that fairy tales didn’t come true.


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Anonymous said...

Oohhh, love the excerpt. And Casey, she hits close to home. :)

Minx Malone said...

Thanks Jessica! I think there's a little Casey in all of us sometimes.

Michelle Lauren said...

Great excerpt Minx. Casey sounds interesting. I like the ending hook. Makes me wonder what crushed fairy tale dreams she has experienced.